In light of recent events...

Long post ahead. Pretty religious, pretty political. Be forewarned.

Wednesday, the Supreme Court somehow overturned a proposition that was passed in California some years ago that was commonly known as Proposition 8. This act basically defined a marriage as between a man and a woman, a "spouse" being someone that you were legally married to as someone opposite your gender. It was strange, because the majority of voters were the ones to pass it in the first place – and now there's 5 out of 9 people saying it's wrong, therefore declaring it "unconstitutional." Here is a statement from the Mormon Newsroom, posted that day:

The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints released the following statement today regarding the decisions announced by the United States Supreme Court on cases involving marriage:

"By ruling that supporters of Proposition 8 lacked standing to bring this case to court, the Supreme Court has highlighted troubling questions about how our democratic and judicial system operates. Many Californians will wonder if there is something fundamentally wrong when their government will not defend or protect a popular vote that reflects the views of a majority of their citizens.

"In addition, the effect of the ruling is to raise further complex jurisdictional issues that will need to be resolved.

"Regardless of the court decision, the Church remains irrevocably committed to strengthening traditional marriage between a man and a woman, which for thousands of years has proven to be the best environment for nurturing children. Notably, the court decision does not change the definition of marriage in nearly three-fourths of the states." Original source, emphasis added.

An unbiased summary of the events as well as reactions from both sides of the issue, as written in part by an acquaintance of mine, can be found here.

For those who might not know, I happen to be a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, commonly known as the Mormons. I strive to live by its teachings by no one's choice but my own. (Why that is the case, I can discuss in a later blog post.) Never have I seen any messages of hate, or offense, or anything of the sort come from the LDS Church, and I've been part of it my entire life. It's been the target of many attacks, especially after having heavily supported Prop 8, but has never gone out of its way to show anything but love and support for others. However, this statement, while strongly worded, is one that I completely agree with. In a time where it feels like our votes don't "really" matter all that much in the first place, this is just icing on the bitter cake. I don't currently live in California, nor was I there when Proposition 8 was originally passed, but I almost fear living there if it means that my voice will no longer be heard.

Marriage is something I believe to be sacred, and sustained by God, and between a man and a woman. It is a privilege, not a right. I do not believe that people should be denied certain rights or privileges based on orientation, gender, skin color, disability, or anything of the sort. If someone should be denied rights or privileges, it should be based on their actions (or, in certain cases, lack thereof). True, there are certainly people who happen to have feelings of attraction toward their same gender. But just because I feel like doing something doesn't mean I have to go out and do it. An example: say I'm at work in an office one day, and I get overly stressed. A fairly common situation for some people, depending on the job. But this one day, I'm so stressed that I just get this crazy idea to start smashing things up in the workspace – not hurting anyone but destroying their computers, their desks, their personal belongings. No one would actually be hurt, but things just wouldn't be the same any more. Damage would be done. It would make me feel great, but others would feel hurt from my actions, they would feel offended because of my actions.
Do I have to go and smash up that office because I have a strong feeling to do so? Because I really, really want to? Of course not. Am I even allowed to? No, not without repercussions. Do two men or two women who feel a strong attraction for one another have to sleep together? ...This is where it begins to get fuzzy. No, of course they don't have to sleep together, but people say that they're more than allowed to. If they're in love, society today dictates that they probably should start sleeping together. And apparently the law says they're entitled to marry each other and have the same privileges that I would have if I had a wife. Am I personally damaged by that? No. But I feel like I am, because something that I have always believed to be sacred is now being redefined by a court of a few imperfect people. (I say imperfect here; there was of course only One perfect man to walk the earth, and I don't know that I would be any better than any of the Supreme Court Justices on a day-to-day basis.) And their definition is ruining the sacredness of what I believe. Yes, I know I can still go on and get married on my own to a woman I love, but it just feels... wrong to know that Joe Shmoe and John Doe would try to have the same full relationship that I'd have with my wife. I just know they're not acting right, and I just know that there is so much more they could get out of life.
What infuriates me most is how the issue gets promoted and dealt with over and over and over again. Many times I feel like it does get shoved in my face, despite claims of not doing so. Don't believe me? Look at the following picture:

YouTube's logo, flavor text highlighted, for today, 6/28/2013

Should the Supreme Court not have voted the way it did on Wednesday, I can guarantee that that picture would not be there today. It's a victory banner, and because it's on a website viewed by millions of people every minute, yes it's shoving it in our face. Why can't there be pride in the traditional values that have held up for THOUSANDS of years? Why can't there be pride in a man loving a woman, the woman loving the man, them wanting to have children, raise their own family, teach them correct principles, and live full, meaningful lives? Because that's biased, sexist, and offensive. And now unconstitutional.


*sigh*
I don't write what I write without thinking about it, nor without pause or patience. I know that if I were to truly write things out of anger or spite, mashing my keyboard to quickly get a point out, I'd be sure to offend a lot of people, many for whom I care deeply. These are personal thoughts that I post because I need to get them out. Yes, my beliefs are firmly rooted in the teachings of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, and I'm not ashamed to say that. For those who want to understand where they (and I) come from on this issue, there are a number of resources. First is a statement that came out in 1995, entitled "The Family: A Proclamation to the World." It is an organized list of statements as given by the presiding council of the LDS Church of what exactly a family is and how it should function. Why it's important that there's a man and a woman in the home. It's not long, only about a page or two in length. Second is a response that was given to a petition by the Human Rights Campaign from about three years ago. It is a statement given regarding certain bullying events that took place because of the sexual orientation of certain individuals, and it has many points relevant to the topic at hand. Third, there are a few websites to look at, produced by the LDS Church, and perfectly visible to anyone who wants to see them: mormon.org, a site geared toward those who don't know much about the Church and want to know more; lds.org, where most of our doctrine can be found in detail; and a newer site called mormonsandgays.org, dedicated specifically to how we wish to interact with and include those who deal with homosexuality on a regular basis. Again, nothing of hate. Nothing of ill will. Nothing about discrimination. Just offers of hope and love, which we really need more of in this world.

At the time of writing, I don't feel like I'm anywhere near the moment shown in this picture. But when I get there, I want it to be as sacred, special, and memorable as possible.

Shooting the breeze

What to write, what to write... I'm trying to figure out if I should figure out regular days to post on here or if I should just keep it to whenever I get around to it. I'm leaning more towards a regular schedule, especially since past experience has taught me that if I don't make an effort to turn an activity into a habit, it rarely, if ever, ends up happening at all. Like exercise...

I think I mentioned in a previous post that I've got two big ideas for YouTube shows to make on a regular basis. Short movie-making is a hobby of mine, and with either one I feel like I'd have a good amount of success.

Idea #1: A popular kind of channel on the Tube these days is music, specifically covers of other people's songs in different styles or genres. As I mentioned in my last post, covers get to be extremely popular, even if the changes aren't all that different or the final product ends up just being a combination of a few different songs with nothing changed at all. So what I'd like to do is similar, but instead of singing songs in my own style I would play saxophone for the melodies and arrange a track to play along to. I've been playing alto sax for years outside of a band setting anyway; normally what I do is just hook up some speakers to my laptop, put my music library on shuffle, and just start playing along. The only real issue I'd have with it before starting is trying to figure out recording equipment... I've never seriously tried to record myself playing something, so I don't know what kind(s) of microphones or cameras would be best for that kind of video. Yet.

My baby. Had it since Christmas of 2004, loved it ever since.

Idea #2, and the one I'm leaning more towards for the moment: a DVD review show, specifically reviewing movies that are found for cheap. We have thrift shops and $5 bins and people almost giving them away on Craigslist, considering how cheap they sell some of them for, and a lot of these movies are still in great quality. So my idea for this is to review the DVD as a whole, not just the movie - because, honestly, I prefer owning the movie over using some service like Netflix. Don't get me wrong, I know that Netflix, Hulu+, and other subscription services are great, but not everything I want to watch is on there. That, and the fact that you don't really get special features when using an online streaming service. So I'd review the DVD, plus any features on them, and give an overall recommendation of whether or not it would ever be worth getting. As my dad put it, kind of a Roger Ebert review, just talking about the movie and showing clips from it. I know who Ebert was, but I can't say I've seen much of his work, so I might look into some of that before starting on a project like this.

I have a decent amount of movies at my disposal... just saying.

Both music channels (be them for simply reposting songs by other artists, reposting them and including lyrics, or making covers of songs) and review channels (for movies, bands, video games, etc.) have found success on the internet. Obviously not everyone, though. Some continuously post, hoping one day to get "discovered" and become rich and famous. The problem with a lot of them is that they aren't super original, or if they are, then they just haven't marketed their product the right way yet. Take this show, for a good example: he produces it all very well, he's expanded to a crew of multiple people, and his idea of reviewing games is unique compared to most. (He plays video games and 100% completes them, no matter how long or short they may be.) It's not the most popular show on YouTube, but it's certainly brought him a decent amount of success so far, and it doesn't look like he has any intent to stop. Which, when you're doing something you love, would be crazy.

Music, a daily supplement

I've noticed recently a couple of my friends showing some surprise when I know the lyrics to certain songs, or that I'm familiar with a band that isn't "popular"or "mainstream." Or they're just surprised with how much I know about some that are popular or mainstream. My response to that: ...well, music's a pretty dang important part of my life, and makes it a lot more meaningful/entertaining. I'm certain that we have music for a reason (or, probably multiple reasons), and it affects every one of us in some way.

My taste in music is pretty eclectic, spanning genres from classical to dance to rock to [some] rap to acoustic to electronic to jazz to mixes of everything in between. I can appreciate a pop song on the radio (depending on the artist) just as much as I can relax to a piece from Bizet's Carmen. One thing that I've actually come to love in the last few years is when two genres collide, and one is covered by another. For example, this is a fairly recent song that I would play at a dance or Divine Comedy event, wherever I would need to keep an audience pumped up and excited:

Then there's this guy who did an AMAZING cover of it with just a piano, probably a couple different takes, a decent amount of editing, and lots of practice to get it all right:

I know how to play basic piano, and like messing around on it and playing simple versions of songs that are kinda popular. But this... I'm just in awe at what he was able to pull off. Both versions of this song just put me in a good mood; either one can come on my music player, and most likely it won't be skipped.

Music is integral in my life. I've got a fairly large collection that just continues to grow based on songs I hear every day. I'd be lost without the apps on my phone that identify songs for me that I don't yet know (see the mini rant I had in my last post about technology these days and how incredible it truly is). If for some reason I don't have a music player around me, I'll start humming or whistling something. It just gets me by throughout the day. Some people used to do those "soundtracks for my life" posts on Myspace and Facebook back in the days when "notes" were still popular, and I'll admit that I did it once or twice. But honestly, I think it'd be amazing to have music playing wherever I went. It only enhances whatever I'm experiencing at the moment. It can change my mood, for better or for worse, or push me farther when I'm exercising, or just keep my mind focused on whatever I'm working on. I like to think of it as a necessary part of a balanced life.

Why blog?

I've always felt that I'm better at expressing myself better through the written word as opposed to the spoken word. Mostly because with writing, I've got an opportunity to think a lot about what to say, how to say it, and how it'll be most effective for whoever ends up being my audience. Speaking out loud doesn't give nearly as much time to think, so while I still try to think before I blurt out things, if I can write it, I feel like I'm getting my point across exactly how I want it.

I have actually been meaning to do something like this for a while, and maybe eventually I'll do video postings as well. I'd still want to write everything out, for the purpose listed above, but for now I'll stick with just text. I don't think this blog has been seen by anyone I don't personally know yet, so with me writing you should all know how I look and sound anyway... Right?
Come to think of it, I actually did try to make a couple video journals in the past. But I didn't end up liking them so much, and I think the biggest reason was just that I'm one of those people that hates the sound of my own voice. (Okay, maybe not hate, but it's just...weird to me. And I'm sure I'm not the only one that experiences that phenomenon.) Eventually I'll have to become a bit more comfortable with it, because there are a couple ideas for shows I want to make on YouTube that I'm pretty serious about that would eventually require some talking, but for now I'll ease into putting my voice on the internet through this blog.

So why a blog? People have numerous other ways of communicating these days, including Facebook, Twitter, YouTube, Tumblr, Instagram, Pintrest, and most likely a bunch of other outlets that I'm leaving out. A blog, though, feels a lot more organized to me. Again, I can plan out exactly what to say and how to say it, and any time I'd like to share a specific post it's just a matter of looking at the title and clicking on it. It all gets organized by date, not necessarily by tags (I don't think I've bothered putting a single tag on any of these posts yet, to be honest).

On that note, just a little rant (a positive one) about technology these days: it's pretty ridiculous. I know we're still a long way from what the Jetsons had in the old TV show, but with some things we're not too far behind. I was able to write almost all of one of my recent posts from my phone. I saved it, waited until I could get to a computer so I could revise it and include a picture, then put it online and available for anyone to see within seconds. Television comes to us in numerous ways - if we want to watch an episode of our favorite show, we can see it by satellite, cable, or the internet (even if we missed the actual air time). Games have evolved SO much from where they first started - instead of using a controller to move two paddles up and down in a game of Pong, we have wireless controllers with a number of sticks and buttons to control characters that, in certain games, we can even make to look like ourselves. Heck, some games these days don't even NEED controllers! There's simply a camera that watches what we do and mirrors those movements on screen. Then there's the fact that almost all of this can be done not just at home, but on the go as well. People from twenty or thirty years ago would be thoroughly impressed, if not a little scared, with the technological capabilities we have today. Rant over.

Anyway, I feel like blogging is not yet a lost art form. Here I can personalize it to how I want it to look, and I'm free to talk about anything I'd like. Writing gives me freedom, and freedom feels amazing.

My dad

Shorter post today, mostly because it's already kinda late, but I wanted to post this while it was still actually Father's Day. My dad is amazing, to say the least, and I get a lot of my humor from him. (It's still up for debate if that point about our sense of humor is a good thing or a bad thing...) He's taught me many things over my 23 years, continues to teach me today, and I'm lucky to be relatively close to him and my mom geographically considering the fact that I live in a college town where people come from (literally) all over the world, often times leaving their families behind and getting to see them once or twice a year at most. I think I see my parents a few times a month, at least. Seriously, I love my dad, and I know he's one of the biggest influences I have in my life. Certainly he's been an example of the kind of father I want to be whenever I get to that point.

Today, after a dinner with the fam at their house

I can't remember a single major decision in my life that I've made without first talking to him at least a little about it, and even then I'm sure it was more than just a little. There's just something about going to Dad for help or counsel that always seems to make things better or more manageable. Or both. I'm lucky to have him, and glad that I do. I'm sure I'm still gonna need his advice as long as I live.

Life goes on

Disclaimer: very long post. Usually I probably won't write this much, but this is a topic that's been on my mind pretty heavily for the last couple weeks.

Today was a significant day for the family of a dear friend of mine. Up in Windsor, Colorado, a funeral was held for Tyler Mayle, who I got lucky enough to know after he moved into the apartment complex I live in. He was a year younger than me, played in the school's marching band, worked for broadcasting, was an excellent musician, a stalwart American, loved the whole lore of Lord of the Rings, and as far as I could tell he didn't meet a single person he couldn't call his friend. His passing was hard for all who knew him, and even some who barely knew him, which is why many decided to come to a remembrance service that was held for him last week and the subsequent funeral today.

The remembrance service was interesting to say the least, as I had never been to anything like it before. I've been to a couple funerals, but it was nothing like any funeral I've heard of. Per request of the family, people came up and simply talked about the good memories they had of Tyler, often being pretty hilarious. I had some of my own, but seeing as none of the memories I had of him were truly unique - like one-on-one with him, I unfortunately knew him for less than a year - I didn't spend a lot of time talking (thinking that others would talk about those stories, which some did). I ended up laughing along with everyone else, including his parents, who said that they were unsure the night before if they would ever laugh again. It was an evening I won't soon forget, and truly hope it stays in my mind.

Something said at the end of the service that made it so significant was that from all the stories, all the memories of him that were shared, the way to not waste those memories would be to take his example in two or three characteristics or qualities and apply them in our own lives. Considering how good of a friend he was to me, it would be hard not to do so.
Recently I've been going through my movie collection and watched the movie version of A Series of Unfortunate Events. (I have a point to this, hold on.) Despite being based on a children's book series and not being a blockbuster hit by any means, there were those few lines of narration and dialogue that saved it and made it memorable for me. One in particular, from the narrator, was this very true comment:

"If you have ever lost someone very important to you, then you already know how it feels; and if you haven't, you cannot possibly imagine it."

Tyler's death was not the first one in my life, but it was the first in a long time. Many feelings that I hadn't felt in years resurfaced, and I had no choice but to feel them once I heard the news of his passing.
In the story, the main characters quickly find themselves orphaned and alone in the world, and soon after are met with further pain as the antagonist tries repeatedly to get the inheritance that their parents left. (Here's the point I wanted to get at.) Despite facing even more trials after their parents' death, and despite being just a 14-year-old, a 12-year-old, and an infant, they don't forget the love their parents showed for them. They don't give in to the pressures forced on them by their antagonist. They continually use their talents to pull themselves out of danger and show others what they're made of. The movie ends on a much lighter note than the books do, with a letter from their parents arriving in the mail for them. (It had been explained earlier that it was delayed and originally thought to be lost.) Excerpts from that letter are as follows:

"At times the world can seem an unfriendly and sinister place, but believe us when we say that there is much more good in it than bad. All you have to do is look hard enough. And what might seem to be a series of unfortunate events may, in fact, be the first steps of a journey... It fills us with pride to know that no matter what happens in this life, that you three will take care of each other, with kindness and bravery and selflessness, as you always have. And remember one thing, my darlings, and never forget it: that no matter where we are, know that as long as you have each other, you have your family. And you are home."

I may be over-dramatizing things a little bit with this movie reference. Oh well. The thought came to me that these parents, knowing what position their children were in, would be proud of them for not giving up, not forgetting the things they were taught, not neglecting the example they were left.

There is a time to grieve, and mourn, and truly feel the pain for what is lost, it's true. I felt it all of last week, and some pain still lingers. But I knew Tyler fairly well, and I know that he wouldn't expect me to feel that pain forever. He would want me, and all close to him, to keep moving forward with their lives, to continue on their own journeys, and take the lessons that he left us - mostly just by his daily example - to use for ourselves in an effort to enhance and enrich this time that we're left with.

My life goes on. I intend to make the best of it. By no means am I perfect, but that won't stop me from trying to get there some day. Thank you, Tyler Mayle, for your wonderful example.

"My greatest moments of peace have been found in the tops of the mountains."

Redoing this, for real

I've actually had this blog for a while now. Like... over a year. And the posts I had on here were all just kinda... bleh. I'm tweaking a few things, got rid of all the old posts, and will be starting anew on here once more. Hopefully, fingers crossed, I'll be successful in posting something with a lot more frequency.

I think one of the biggest things that discouraged me from posting was that I was never sure what to post about. Like... one of the posts that I had was a list of New Year's resolutions. Another was a posting of a bunch of photoshopped playing cards I had made. And another was just a link to a video I put together for a contest on Rooster Teeth. Seriously, all pretty random. Now that I've come back here, I think the way that I want to run this blog is to have it as sort of a public journal; I'm not going to be 100% explicit about my daily life, obviously, but there are things that I like to think about and write about, and if people want to come look at that on a regular basis then they're more than welcome to. It'll at least give me a way to vent, rant, express, praise, gripe, convey, manifest, profess, proclaim, assert, whatever the heck I feel like doing. (Thank you, MacBook dictionary, for those synonyms.) I write like I talk, which I've been told is usually a good thing, so hopefully my voice will come through loud and clear.

At the time of posting this, it's already almost 11:00 PM, so I don't think I'll write too much more tonight. But I feel like that's a good intro for now.